Today would of been my mother’s 65th Birthday if she were still with us. . .
My heart simply won’t let go doing it any other way, so it’s back to what works for me. As harsh as it may be, it’s what I must do to preserve who I am on the inside.
Dr. MLKJ said it best. “Our Lives begin to end the day we become silent about the things that matter” When searching for the imagery for this entry, I became sick. It’s a disgrace that they claim to protect the children, then under the surface of lies and mistrust do something evil, sick, and twisted with them all for a profit.
Honestly, I believe I’ve had enough of the vicious emotional games that most ghastly men try to play. From the foolish ones, those who think it’s okay for them to behave a certain way. . . .
Dodging bullets is not an easy thing to realistically achieve. However, I’ve carefully managed to dodge two of them already this miserable year. First with Mark, now with Ricardo. We both knew we undoubtedly had an up hill battle if we genuinely wanted to be together. We each admittedly had an obstacle, mine being emotional, and his being obligational. All it would merely take was one of us being unable to cope adequately with the other’s specific situation, and it would be over. Not surprisingly, he quit and gave up.
After a two day relentless flood of excessive emotions and pent-up feelings, I evanesced into a world of technology and optimization. The familiar sound of a voice which caused the wound on my heart to bleed yesterday, happened to be the same sound today that comforted me. Why did William . . .
Every so often it’s the insignificant things that sincerely mean the most. It was around lunch time when my mobile phone rang, and on the other end Wolfie was calling. Absolutely surprised, I picked up the phone naturally assuming he was taking his lunch break. Recently, I’ve had the feeling that he and I were drifting apart, with an enormous mountain looming in front of us. This afternoon those foolish feelings would change. This small gesture instantly made those feeling go away.
Xatina, this time you will lay in the bed that you made. If this story is even true, remember the next time you’re laying at the bottom of the stairs with broken limbs
Good evening, it’s presently 9:35 p.m. on Monday the 6th of April. This journal entry is since Saturday the 4th, Sunday the 5th, and today Monday the 6th of April. It has been undoubtedly a whirlwind the past three days. Saturday and Sunday I felt completely lost, last night I dealt with many family dramas, and today has been chaos. I’m thinking people are starting to lose their flipping minds.